There are a lot of times when I look back in horror at some of the dumb license plates that I’ve had over the course of my life. From LFTW8TS to ILNDLVN. First LFTW8TS was my mom’s idea. It was the first time I had ever actually started lifting in college and I was getting “way too big” in her eyes, she thought I was doing steroids but wanted to support me so she got me that custom tag for my truck. The problem is I was still kinda fat so my dickhead frat “brothers” certainly had a field day with that. So much so that my first reaction was “oh I’ll just tell them it’s “Left with 8 Tees”, like I’m a golfer…”. That was dumb, my story ended up being that I spent the summer working with my uncle, who at the time was a personal trainer. Didn’t matter. They didn’t believe it anyway, I had a reputation for telling elaborate half-truths. Probably why today I’m a fiction and fantasy writer. People used to tease me, now they pay me. Nerds rule. #hopsoffsoapbox The second was ILNDLVN, which, when I had to change from LFTW8TS was actually the first vanity plate that I have ever gotten on my own, consequently it was also the very last vanity plate I have ever requested. I “asked” for “ILND LVN”, island living. At the time I was taking maybe 4 trips a year to the Bahamas. The Atlantis was giving great comps and the economy was great for my family’s business so we were fortunate to get the time to go, I went during all my school breaks and during the summer. It was awesome and it’ll never happen again, well maybe someday. Unfortunately the inmates stamping my plate decided to leave out the space. I went from Island Livin’ to I Land Lovin’, now I’m a pirate. One stoned guy asked if I was illin’ deliverin’ pizzas or something. I told him to lay off the whacky tabacky. Here are things I wish I would have thought of doing. I’ve even had some radical cars names I could have associated: “Expedition, Explorer, Flex, Escape”! Ford really plays well into the custom plate initiative, and most car names are kinda cool.
